My Daughter Is Married

B and J Wedding 01042014-0124My daughter got married yesterday to a wonderful young man whom I have come to love as a son. While I felt all the joy and tenderness of watching my daughter and my now-son-in-law exchanging vows and starting a new chapter in their lives as husband and wife, the reality of what has transpired yesterday, that she’s now married and no longer a part of my household, didn’t really hit me till this morning.

You see, yesterday, I simply did the same things I’ve always done before in her life. I was there to share her joy. I helped her and supported her whenever she needed me and called for me. I held her close and kissed her. I told her she was beautiful. These are all things I’ve always done for her as her mother.

But this morning, I did something I’ve never done before as her mother. . . I changed her last name on my cell phone directory. That’s when it hit me that she’s no longer Rebekah Constance Doell. She’s now Rebekah Constance Barker. There’s just something so final about that, and it caught me off guard.

I kept telling myself that she’s still the same person, that she’s still my daughter, that only her last name has changed. But somehow it hit me hard. The last name Doell is yet one more thing we used to share that is now gone in the process of watching her grow up and letting her go.

It will take me a while to get used to her new last name.

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One Comment on “My Daughter Is Married”

  1. SA says:

    There’s a different ring about it.

    I think it might literally sound more final – ‘Doell’ has a ring to , ‘Barker’ sounds like an officer.

    The alliteration doesn’t help either, (r) e B e K ah Con St ance Bar kah sounds like a bit of a chant you might hear for a gladiator or a ring fight, and the old name does sound very much like someone ringing a bell Be Kah Doell (think chinese cymbal here).

    Nothing wrong with the new name, just hoping to shed light on why it sounds more formal.

    But you’re right, it does sound different – without launching into a philosophical inquiry as to the meaning of a name. I kinda like the idea of a militaristic Bekah. 😉


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